The past month has been cold. So cold that it felt like Summer ended long ago. We’re not even 2 full weeks into Fall yet, but it feels like Winter. A bad one at that. No swell, really cold water, and pretty empty lineups.
There have been a few sneaky days here and there with fun opportunities. I’ve scored a couple of windows myself, as I just spoke about yesterday. One of these particular sessions, about 2 weeks ago now, I was personally victimized in the lineup. It was one of the most egregious offenses against Rule Number 30 of our unwritten Rulebook, possibly in history.
Rule Number 30, you ask? Well, here – Rule Number 30:
NO PHYSICAL CONTACT IN THE LINEUP
Here’s the story, it’s a good one.
So, the offender is actually a familiar face to the Rulebook – he is the originator of Surf Rules. Truly. I realized this when I was pondering the whole debacle; I wrote one of the original pieces of this website about him. If you don’t remember the 3 Day Lot Rule, please, enlighten yourself. I really slipped up by not naming that Rule Number One of the unofficial, official, unspoken Rulebook of Surfing. I’ve been abiding by this rule again since this ordeal took place.
Right, so what the hell am I talking about? Well this character, we’ll still keep his name retracted, doesn’t live in town full time. He comes and goes, and I hadn’t seen him for a while. He wasn’t surfing his typical zone – probably following The Rule – and I ran (paddled) into him in the lineup. Friendliest guy, honestly doesn’t mean any harm at all, but almost just bums you out when you see him in the water. He did that thing again where he yells from quite literally 2 peaks over at people to, “GO LEFT”.
I saw him before he saw me, of course. I was attempting to keep my distance, but at some point sooner than later, as fate would have it, our independent surf sessions would incorporate.
“Hey man! How are you? So good to see you!”
I’m pretty sure he doesn’t even know me by name.
To be fair, I don’t think a lot of people I talk to in the water do.
“Hey whatsup ___________. Good to see you too, dude.”
Luckily, this was a brief interaction. A set was rolling through. Waves were really fun this day – at least in comparison to what we’d recently had on offer.
It was not even 5 minutes later when we crossed paths again. This time, he is posted, and I’m making a paddle back out. Mistakenly, I got too close. He sits up on his board and reaches his hand out for one of those hugs/handshakes. I’m not going to be the jerk and just ignore it, I’m staring right at him. I, laying on my board, reach my hand out and dap him up. He pulls himself in, floating closer for the hug. I’m still laying down facing South down the beach, and he is sitting up facing East towards the sand. The nose of his board completely rakes the bottom of my board somewhere. Nails on a chalkboard moment – only underwater.
“Ah shoot dude! I’m really sorry if that did any damage!”
***feeling up and down the rails of my board***
“Nah man no worries. I work at the shop, I can fix it if anything. Sorry if your nose is dinged at all..”
(It wasn’t).
“Don’t sweat it! It’s just the nose. I’m not too worried about this board anyway!”
He was still talking as I was paddling away. I’ve actually since then wondered if he knew I was pissed off. Surprisingly, I don’t think I gave that off. I didn’t feel anything on my board, so no big deal, right?
Now that I’m some distance away and some waves have passed through, I do my real assessment – Get off the board and flip it over.
Boom.
Bink.
There it is.
It looked like a car door after it had been keyed. Right along the rail line there was a puncture hole, followed by a long sliding crack, and a finishing puncture hole just next to the left fin box. Small, but cracked through to let water in, no doubt.
What the fuck was that? Did that really just happen? Why would he do that? Was that on purpose?
Nah. I’m tripping. No way that was on purpose. Right? Right.
Moral of the story – No Physical Contact in the water. It’s completely unnecessary, and can only cause more harm than good. Plus its Rule Number 30.
Cheers,
hwilsin
Drew Stanfield